ChatGPT said:
Helicopter parenting can continue even after kids are grown and starting families. Imagine trying to nap during a tough pregnancy, only to wake and find your mother-in-law standing over your bed.
That is reality for the Original Poster. Her pregnancy rest has been disrupted by constant intrusions, turning a time that should be peaceful into a battle for privacy.
More info: Reddit
When family visits shift from caring to controlling, the home can become stressful instead of a safe place
Image credits: standret / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The pregnant woman’s mother-in-law often showed up unannounced and even used a spare key to enter the home
Image credits: Fickle-Armadillo-282
Image credits: sosiukin / Freepik (not the actual photo)
One day, the mother-in-law entered her bedroom without permission while she was napping and stood watching her sleep
Image credits: Fickle-Armadillo-282
Image credits: The Yuri Arcurs Collection / Freepik (not the actual photo)
To protect her privacy, the woman put a lock on her bedroom door. This angered her mother-in-law, who accused her of being controlling and rude.
Image credits: Fickle-Armadillo-282
Her husband asked her to remove the lock to keep peace, while relatives claimed pregnancy hormones were making her paranoid
The OP and her husband have been married three years and are expecting their first child. What should be a joyful time has been overshadowed by her mother-in-law, who lives just 20 minutes away and treats that as permission to visit whenever she wants.
At first, the surprise visits were annoying. Then they became unsettling. The mother-in-law started using a spare key to enter the house on her own. Once, she even walked straight into the bedroom while OP was sleeping and stood over her, later saying she only wanted to “check in.” When OP told her husband, he brushed it off as his mother being “motherly.”
After repeated intrusions, OP installed a lock on the bedroom door. The next time her mother-in-law dropped by and couldn’t get in, she was furious. She called OP’s husband, claiming she feared something had happened. Later that night, she accused OP of being controlling and rude.
Instead of supporting OP, her husband asked her to remove the lock to keep the peace. His family also sided with the mother-in-law, calling OP “dramatic” and blaming her concerns on pregnancy hormones. Feeling isolated, OP began to wonder if she was wrong for wanting privacy.
Relationship coach and marriage counselor Nike Folagbade told Bored Panda that in-law boundary issues often reflect the couple’s communication more than the relatives’ behavior. She advised couples to approach it as a team, share concerns openly, agree on common ground, and let the partner related to the family set the boundaries.
Image credits: kittip*rn sakchampha / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Folagbade explained that enabling a parent can harm a marriage when it upsets the balance, creates resentment, or sparks constant conflict. This often happens when one partner puts a parent’s needs above the relationship, excuses harmful behavior, or carries their stress into the marriage.
She stressed that boundaries are not about cutting parents out, but about protecting the marriage so both partners feel respected and united. For expectant parents, she suggested planning ahead with a “welcome plan.” This means setting clear rules about visits, overnight stays, advice, and decision-making, then sharing them with family in a respectful way.
Online, most readers supported OP. They called the mother-in-law’s actions overbearing and invasive and criticized the husband for enabling her. Many said privacy and boundaries should come first, especially during pregnancy.
Do you think OP was right to install a lock on her bedroom door, or was it an overreaction?
The author felt isolated and wondered if she was wrong for setting boundaries, but netizens assured her she was not
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